Saturday, July 31, 2010

The Bookish Snob's Idea of the Perfect Man

So I've been lying in bed today, kind of thinking over things I needed to do and looking over at the HUGE to-be-read pile I have on my side dresser that has me and my hubby worried and planning escape routes because if that sucker crashes, it could take us YEARS to dig our way out. Are any of you like me, who just sit and stare and get this body shiver of anticipation over all the future sexy men you get to read? Do you wonder who they are and what they are? What will they look like and what makes them special? Looking over some of the titles I see a lot of vampires, werewolves, a few warlocks and sexy highlanders. And then I had a funny thought that hasn't left my mind since. What would my dream man look like if I took some of the things I love most from the guys I read and kind of smooshed them altogether. Here's what I came up with:
(click title for more)

The BookishSnob's Dream Man would be a strong and protective man who spoke with a thick Scottish brogue that sometimes turned into a lisp as he tried to manage the dropping of his fangs when he was either hungry or "excited" (which would be ALL the time) He would of course have a VERY well defined six pack which he would continuously flaunt by wearing a plaid and nothing else... ok I'll let him wear something else.... a BIG BIG broadsword strapped across his back. He would have black flowing hair that would have twin warrior braids down each side of his face (those could help hide his Fae ears) and his eyes would be mesmerizing (because honestly being part vamp he would need to be able to use compulsion... not on me but on all our future minions) He would never mock me during "my" time of the month because like best friends who "synch" at the same time, my time will match with his time of going all wolfy. He could go on his monthly hunt, bring home the "bacon" and I'll be waiting there to cook it for him in my heels, apron and string of pearls.(oh there is something wrong with that image.. I'd say I'd be barefoot and pregnant but can you imagine my dilemma ... will I have a litter of bloodsucking pups or a flock of sword yielding bats?) After a wonderful meal and a quick sip of blood, we would end the night in our flannel PJs shaving our legs and with me helping him shave his back because hot wolf or not, back hair is just gross. Right before we turn off the lights (because readers this isn't a book with the love scene written in descriptive detail) let me just tell you there will be howling and growling, bloodletting screams and when the room stops shaking the sounds of a haunting tune played by bagpipes will be heard.

Doesn't he sound delicious? Now see if you can create yours. Happy inventing and sweet dreaming after. Now if you excuse me I have some..umm "business" to show.. I mean talk about with my fantasy guy. I wonder what I should call him? ??

7 comments:

Lyndsey said...

What a fantastic post. Think I'll have a go at my perfect man later on in the week. Yours is certainly a concoction of all sorts but sounds pretty hunky! x

Blueicegal ♥ said...

oh my god!!! hahahahaa funny, i loved the shaving his back and legs things hehehe, oh my these make me laugh i must do one of my own soon! :D

thebookishsnob said...

Hey Lyndsey,

I went to your site and LOVED your perfect man. Now all we need is that man dough of yours :)

Yep my man is a "delicious" concoction of sorts. All I could imagine was this version of vampire/werewolf/highlander all rolled up and smooshed into one man. But with your man dough thrown in there, I'm imagining a Play Doh man with bits and pieces stuck into it - a werewolve arm here, a highlander chest there, vampire leg there. *Shudders* so not the image I wanted.

thebookishsnob said...

Hey Blueicegal,

Glad you liked the post. Let me know when you create your perfect man and leave a link. Then we'll go raid Lyndsey's cupboard for her man dough and see what fun we can have :)

Lyndsey said...

I thought I would leave you a little update after reading Lacey's books.

http://yafiction-heavenhellandpurgatory.blogspot.com/2010/08/perfect-man.html

How could I not have a bit of Vance in there??

thebookishsnob said...

Lyndsey,

LOVED the update :)I have to ask though ... do I get to pick what "bit" of Vance I want? Hmmmmm decisions, decisions, decisions... which part to choose. Might need to a BIG piece of man dough ROFL

We are SO bad (like how I included you in my not so pure thoughts?) My thinking is that way if I get caught I can blame you. Fun, Vance pieces and an alibi. Life couldn't get better than that.

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